CASE FILE: Dating

Subject: David Berkowitz Known for: The “Son of Sam” shootings and prolific correspondence Estimated victims: 6 deceased, 7 wounded Operational period: 1976–1977

Dating in the modern age can feel like navigating a dark, winding road. You spend hours driving around, looking for that perfect, quiet spot where you can finally make your move. But hesitation is the real romance killer. If you see someone who catches your eye, parked under the amber glow of a streetlamp, do not simply watch from the shadows. You must take the initiative. Walk right up to the window. Boldness is key. When you finally make contact, ensure it is high-impact. You want to leave them completely breathless, unable to forget the moment your paths crossed.

Of course, a successful relationship relies on open communication. In my years with the postal service, I learned that a well-placed message can change everything. Do not rely on fleeting, digital whispers. Write to them. Put your deepest thoughts on paper. A hand-written letter, bold and demanding of attention, shows that you are willing to go the extra mile to make your presence felt. It should arrive unexpectedly, cutting through the mundane junk mail of their daily life. Keep the tone mysterious but intimate. Let them know you are watching, caring, and thinking of them constantly.

Finally, beware of outside advice. Relationships are between two people. It is easy to let the howling distractions of the world dictate your actions—especially when a neighbor’s dog won’t stop bark-ordering you around. Trust your own instincts. When the night is late, the city is quiet, and the caliber of your commitment is tested, you must be the one to pull the trigger on the relationship.

File closed. Results pending.